Caring For An Elderly Parent: We’re Going To A Concert!

Blog - Pic 110“This is supposed to be the time of my life – the nest is empty; but now Mom needs me.”

The mind is an interesting thing. The one thing I’ve never understood about ageing is hallucinations. Today was a very strange day with Mom – I wonder if it has anything to do with the events that have happened over the last few days because Mom has been out of sorts for a while now.

But today was just strange. My husband and I thought we’d take Mom out for dinner since she’s been asking to go out for the past couple of days. We don’t usually go out during the week because we are so busy, but for some reason Mom has mentioned going out to eat every time I’ve seen her. She is always so happy about going out to eat that I thought that this is just what she needs.

So off we went to a local restaurant where everything went well. Mom enjoyed her dinner (as did we) and, of course, she took home a dessert for later. We noticed that she was not quite herself tho, so when we dropped her off at home I told her I’d come over a little later and spend some time with her.

A few hours later I went over to see how she was doing. My husband came with me to check her kitchen tap (which she mentioned earlier was leaking) – so he got to see Mom in one of her “confused” moments. When we walked in the back door she was on her cell phone calling me, and then she told me she was all ready to go to the concert.

What? She had her shoes on and everything. I, on the other hand, was in my pj’s ready for bed. So Mom starts telling me about how Elsie and Harry (her deceased sister and brother) were telling her to call me so we wouldn’t be late for the concert. Mom couldn’t remember what concert we were going to but I had lots of tickets and a whole bunch of us were going. WOW! My husband looked at me with a WTF look on his face.

I took Mom into the living room and we talked for a bit. She explained what she heard and who was saying it and then I explained that we weren’t going to a concert. She looked at me like I was lying about what went on – she really believes that the whole concert conversation happened.

I’m really having a hard time dealing with Mom’s hallucinations because she believes they are real and can’t understand why I keep telling her they aren’t. Should I NOT tell her they aren’t real? I can’t try to pretend that it’s real. Am I doing more harm than good by trying to let her know that what she’s hearing is in her mind?

It’s just getting weirder and weirder  every day. I usually try to let her know that the noises she hears can be explained by normal old house noises, like irrigation pumps under the house, A/C running, the washer/dryer running, the refrigerator making noise, etc. so she feels more at ease. The one thing I can’t explain to her is the people in the TV behind the program running singing or talking – that is just unexplainable.

What I Learned: I am going to do what ever I can to keep my mind from hallucinating – I sure hope I can.

 

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